Do you ever find yourself thinking, ” I want to become a better person in life”?
Or have you ever asked someone how to become a better person?
Well, we all have. At some point in our lives, we all have thought we are not good enough or we should be better. But is the answer ever simple?
This occurred to me in a counseling session with my client,
I asked,” what stresses you?”
She replied,” I don’t think I am doing good enough. I want to do things better.”
To probe the conversation further, I asked,” Have you been good?”
She answered, ” no, I am not good.” After that there was silence. After taking a moment to herself she slowly stated, “I have to be good don’t I? If I haven’t even been good, how can I be better?”.
This conversation was full of deep thoughts about self-improvement, affirmation, and the power of imagination. But take away for both my client and me was, there never would be a best. There would be good and better than the good. And further improvisation would only bring better to the better but not the best. There would always be room for improvement in a person.
One thing I can tell you from my experience is that you have to know what do you mean by ‘better’ before you ask how can you be better, do better, have better, and give better. Ask yourself what has been ‘good’ according to you and if it has been good enough, what qualifies as better than it is now?
So, if you think you are doing good but you want to be better and do better but don’t know what you are doing less than the good you are already doing, I have some tips. These may not be new but they are the most important things to do to become the best version of yourself for your present.
Here are some tips on how to become a better person inside and out.
10 Tips On How To Become a Better Person
1. Be honest with yourself.
Don’t lie to yourself. If you’re not happy with your life, start making changes. If there’s something that you want but can’t get – find out why. Maybe it’s just the way things are or maybe it’s because of some detrimental belief that you have about yourself limiting what you can do in life?
If you don’t like who you are, make a change starting today!
2. Part of being a better person is not judging others.
Everyone is doing their best based on the information and resources they have available at the time; even if what they did was wrong or hurtful towards someone else, doesn’t mean that they are bad intentioned.
Try to understand them before passing judgment on them – more often than not, everyone is fighting their own battle.
3. Be patient with yourself and others.
Not everyone learns the same way or at the same pace.
Having patience with yourself and not dealing with pressure to achieve too many things in life is another skill.
“Everyone has a different clock, wait for your time.”
It is the same way for others. You ought to have patience with other people too.
If you expect too much from people, they’ll get frustrated easily and so will you because it’s not something that comes naturally to anyone.
Everyone needs time to grow, learn and develop themselves!
4. Simplifying your life by saying “no” more often won’t make you less of a better person.
People tend to complain a lot about a lack of time in their lives but they also complain about how difficult it is to say ‘no’ when someone asks them for favors.
How many times have you found that when someone asks you for a favor that it actually takes up little to no time?
Let’s be honest here – how many of us are guilty of adding even more activities to our already over-scheduled lives because we couldn’t say no? Learning to say “no” is a fundamental skill for effective time management and having that extra time to take care of yourself.
Attending to your needs and putting your priorities straight will not make you a bad or selfish person in any way.
5. Make room for stillness in your life
Don’t have the television on all the time, don’t spend all day scrolling through social media or checking your email – take some time just for yourself!
Go for a walk without music blaring from your earphones into your eardrums, look up at the sky during sunrise or sunset, meditate, etc. Anything that allows you to be 100% present in the current moment with no distractions whatsoever gives you the pleasure of being alive!
A little pleasant moment to yourself with no rush, no hurried schedules, or a list of things to do and achieve. Just you breathing in and breathing out allowing yourself some sense of peace. That stillness is important to calm your mind and tackle with stress and anxiety.
6. Be better at what you love doing most often
Make an effort to do more things that make you happy. You are most productive when you are excited by the things you do. Being interested in activities not only makes you excel at it, but it also gives you self-satisfaction as well.
Make a list of things that you truly enjoy doing, then schedule time every day to do those things! If your schedule doesn’t allow you to pencil in activities at the moment, however, try breaking them down into smaller chunks of time and work it from there – even 10 minutes here or there can make a difference over time.
Life is too short to allow unimportant things to hold you down from being happy and living a purposeful life.
7. A better person is good at better communication.
Not everyone is a born communicator but if you want to get anywhere in life communication skills is a must.
Learning how to express yourself clearly and calmly goes a long way towards getting what you want out of life. Open up conversations with more people by asking questions about their lives, talk less about yourself, and let other people share their stories as well; active listening goes a long way!
Not speaking up for yourself is also a bad communication habit. If you don’t express your thoughts and needs clearly, people won’t know how to help you. Finding the balance in empathetic listening and speaking up for yourself is the key to good communication.
8. Stop expecting so much from others.
If you already did all that was in your power to do something about it, why are you still waiting on someone else before moving forward? It’s never too late to find new ways to solve your problems or look into other opportunities; everything happens for a reason but not everything has the same meaning depending on who’s looking at it.
What’s of utmost priority to you may not be equally important to someone else. Everyone else has enough on their own plates. Don’t be afraid to ask for help but be prepared to be turned down and or told no.
Expecting will always be self-defeating because if nobody can live up to your expectations, then what’s the use of having them anyways? If things go wrong, don’t take it personally – learn from your mistakes and continue going forward!
9. Start looking after your own needs first.
You can’t pour from an empty cup so you have to fill yourself up with the right nutrients before you go out and try to nourish others as well – it’s important to take care of yourself physically, emotionally, mentally, and spiritually as well.
Set sometime aside every day for self-care activities that nurture your body mind and soul i.e. taking a walk, practicing mindfulness, etc!
Watch this inspiring video of Lisa Nichols, A Self-Made Millionaire on looking after your own needs first!
10. Take a leap of faith every now and then.
Life is way too short for being stuck in one place forever; if you really want something enough chances are that success is just around the corner if you take action on it right now.
You’ve got to give it your all, get out of your comfort zone and take risks to move forward! You’ll never know if you can actually do something or accomplish a goal until you try it for yourself. Just remember that getting lost along the way is inevitable but keep moving forward until you find peace.
At last, don’t worry about being a better person. Love yourself and be kind to yourself and others.
Remember, being better, doing better, or living better is not a one-time quest.
It’s a lifetime journey. You will fall short at one thing but excel at another. Focus on one thing about yourself you want to improve and consistently make efforts. Life is about living one moment at a time. Make every moment count.
Wondering how to inspire others? Having an influential personality is an important part of being a better person. Learn more about it here!